A Perverse Panegyric

Nude and wet on this stormy day
You lech at me with abandon, gay
Whilst you think with lustful glee
I'm all bark and leaves of a rainy tree

Burning me inside and out
You wait for me, I spew from my pout
Whilst you think 'bout something I'm not
I'm the Tea, in your Teapot

Murdering me with your sharpest knife
You kill me through your cold-blooded wife
Whilst you sit there, fret and grouse
I'm the tomato, cut by your spouse

I'm lynched today high and dry
No sympathies from passers-by
You got the drift, while I quit
I'm your clothes, you perverted twit!